literature

Something Like Freedom: Chapter Four

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The next morning I was woken to a thud! I jolted forward in bed and for a second, I didn't remember where I was at. But then yesterday came back to me. My room was lit with sunlight and I could see the lake sparkling in the sun. It brought a soft smile to my face, but then I heard it again, another thud! I got out of bed-forgetting I was only wearing a tank top and shorts- and walked towards the sound. It didn't seem like any was awake, so I walked slowly down the stairs to the second floor, where I saw what was causing the noise.
I assumed it was Susan, lying on the hardwood floor in the hallway, her wheelchair tipped over. I ran over to her, seeing she was in dire need of some help. I slowly helped her back into her wheelchair and a sigh left my lips when she smiled at me. She had a gentle face, that looked untouched my sorrow and grief. She had soft green eyes and short brown hair that lay gently on her shoulders and a soft curl to them. Susan was short, I'd noticed that when I picked her up, a little shorter than me. She looked a year younger than me, but Andrew had assured me she was my age.
"Are you alright?" She nodded softly and pointed towards a lose board in the hallway. I guessed she must have gotten stuck on it in her wheelchair and tipped over. The second thud I heard must have been her trying to get back into her chair. "Do you need any help?" She shook her head gently and I watched as she started to wheel her chair down the hallway toward what I assumed was the bathroom. But before she did, she turned her toward me.
"Thank you." Her voice was soft, like a bird's song, and filled my heart with warmth. I didn't ask her why she didn't speak to anyone else, I just smiled back at her.
"You're welcome." I watched her wheel into the bathroom before I walked quietly downstairs. Like I had guessed, no one was awake. With a glance at the clock, I knew it was seven in the morning; which also meant I'd slept well.
I sighed softly and put on my shoes, opening the sliding glass door in the kitchen and walked outside. I waited a few minutes before I walked down the steps to the lake. I expected men to be all over me, shooting me with bullets or trying me down. But like Andrew had promised, I was allowed to come outside today. And the lake was the first place I wanted to go to.
It was lightly chilly out, but the sun soon made my skin feel warm. I wasn't allowed to have such pleasures at the institute. Only rarely went outside and it was only to train in the woods or to go straight to a car. I wasn't allowed to feel the breeze or sit and just feel the sun. For a moment, I really felt free.
I sat at the edge of the dock and stared down at my reflection in the water. I had short, auburn hair, that reached my shoulders, and soft green eyes that had a tint of blue in them. My face looked gentle, but years of sadness had taken its toll and made me look older than I really was. I could see the scar on my right cheek that went from the tip of my eyelid, to the middle of my cheek.
The day I got this scar, was the first day I'd tried to escape. It would forever be a reminder of the first time I'd fail to be free. I'd opened the door to a car while we were moving down the road and jumped over, rolling across the gravel. It'd scratched my legs, had gravel imbedded in my hands, but it didn't stop me. I ran as fast as I could into the nearby woods, but back then, being so young, I was slow. He'd caught me in seconds.
"Where do you think you're going princess?" James grabbed me in his arms and I'd tried to escape, that's when he brought his knife to my face. He never meant to cut me; I'd struggled against him and managed to get him to lose his footing. That's when the knife cut me. I was in shock when it happened; I'd never seen blood, never felt physical pain like this, so I passed out.
I sighed and took my shoes off, slowly placing my feet in the water. I'd never went swimming, but I knew how. I'd done simulations, been thrown in pools of water and forced to swim or they'd let me drown. But here and now, the water felt slightly cold, but my feet grew used to it as I kicked the water back and forth.
"Want to go swimming?" I jumped and almost fell into the water, but he grabbed my shoulder and chuckled. Damien stood behind me, in a white tee shirt and blue and gray checkered swimming trunks. I didn't know why he was here, talking to me. After last night, I figured he would stay away from me, but here we was, asking me to go swimming.
"You want to go swimming with me?" I didn't say it meanly, but I didn't say it kindly either.
"I'm sorry about yesterday," he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "it's just that…" he took a long pause before continuing, "I had a strong urge to kiss you. You looked… so sad talking about it and I panicked and left the room." Damien looked tough, drawn back, and lonely. I hadn't noticed he was squeezing my shoulder until it started to hurt a little.
"I don't have a bathing suit." He chuckled softly and helped me to my feet.
"Well than let's make a trip to town." He grabbed my hand and began to lead me up the steps to the house, but I let go of him and stood there.
"Is it alright… to leave?" He didn't say anything for a moment; he just looked at me with sad eyes.
"Yes, it's alright to leave; as long as you have me." As long as you have me, that sentence rang through my ears and brought small warmth to my heart; but it also held sadness. Sadness that I knew I would always feel, it was the sadness of never being free. I came to terms with it though, knowing it would be alright in the end. I had a sense of freedom and that was good enough for me.
"Alright."
-
I had changed quickly, putting on a silky blue tank top and jean shorts. I'd found my closet filled with clothes I'd never worn or rather, never had. I assumed either Dr. Smith or Andrew had bought me a new wardrobe. I was really happy when I saw it and it made me feel like a normal seventeen year old girl.
Damien waited downstairs, now dressed in a black tee shirt and ripped blue jeans. I put on my old red sneakers and joined in him out in the garage. He was waiting in a silver convertible with its top down. It seemed a little too high class for me, but I hopped into the passenger seat.
"Ready?" He asked as he started the car. I nodded and held my breath, feeling nervous, as he pulled out of the garage. I waited for the helicopter, the army of men, the single gunshot from James to put me out, but it never came. "Relax," he chuckled softly and headed down the gravel driveway, "I got permission from Andrew."
I didn't say anything as he drove past the gate that led to the main road and drove fast down the road. I knew how to drive the car we were in, but I didn't have a license and had never actually driven a car. But I guess I didn't have to. When you were me, things were easier in actual life. It was getting here that was hard.
The main road was black ash vault and it was on a mountain side, overlooking a huge lake. I wondered if it was connected to the lake near Andrew's house. For a moment, I had the strange urge to fly over it; fly into the sky and feel the breeze; but I knew I'd be shot down. I chuckled softly and leaned back in my seat; the seat buckle seeming too tight. But I just let the breeze take me over and let my hair go crazy around me.
I felt free in this moment; truly free. Like nothing mattered and my life before this was just a memory in the distant past. I wanted to believe that I could forget my childhood, forget everything I'd been through, and just start over. Here with Damien, I felt that was possible. I smiled at a flock of birds that flew over us and stared up at the blue sky.
"You alright?" Damien said loudly to me, trying to be heard over the car. I just laughed and ran a hand through my hair.
"Just happy." He chuckled softly and pointed just ahead of us.
That's when I saw it; the little town. It was cute and had a lighthouse that overlooked the lake. I could see the light at the top moving back and forth; even though it was daylight. Next to the lighthouse was a small church, with a cross standing tall at the top of it. I wasn't much for religion, but the church looked beautiful from where I was at. All it's glass windows shining brightly in the sunlight. The town was composed of small shops and houses lining the streets.
Damien drove through the town slowly; following the speeding limit. As we drove by, I spotted a few people on the sidewalks pointing towards us or just looking in our general direction. I hadn't noticed Damien had come to a complete stop until he touched my shoulder gently.
"Don't worry about them," he said with a laugh, "I went to school here and graduated in May. I haven't really come back to the town since." I unbuckled my seat belt as he came around the car to open the door.
"Who are they?" Pain flashed through his eyes, but was quickly covered up so I wouldn't sense it.
"Girls who I turned down," he held his hand out to me to help me out of the car; I took it even though I could get out myself, "nothing to worry about." I didn't ask any more into it, because I could assume why he'd turned them all down. Damien could never happily have a relationship with a normal girl. The moment he touched her, she'd wither in pain and most likely call him a freak. The sad thing was it wasn't his fault.
"Well, that's get looking, I guess." He chuckled softly and led me into the small clothing store.
I walked toward the fist swimming suit I saw. It was a bikini and my favorite shade of blue. It was like a soft orphan blue and the right breast had a white eagle on it. It made me think of myself flying into a blue sky with my wings spread out behind me; free as an eagle.
"Like that one?" Damien stood behind me, looking at a pair of sunglasses on a rack.
"Yeah." I took it off the rack, not wanting anyone to pick it out and take it. I took it to the counter; which was a few feet away from where Damien stood.
"Just this?" The cashier asked, putting down her magazine and taking a moment to ring up the bathing suit.
"Uh, yeah." Damien was next to me in seconds, throwing a matching wallet onto the bathing suit.
"That to." The cashier just rolled her eyes in a way that said, whatever, and rang up our total.
"Fifteen dollars and twenty-six cents is your total." Damien pulled out a black leather wallet and opened it; taking out a twenty and handing it to the women.
Before I knew it we were out the door and I was holding a simple white bag with my bathing suit in it. I wanted to try it on right now and go dive into the water by the road. But then I thought of the small blue wallet with a matching eagle on it.
"Why'd you get me a wallet?" He chuckled and took it out of the bag, opening it and putting in a wad of cash.
"This is yours," he smiled at me and handed me the wallet, but took the bag and placed it in the trunk of the car, "let's get some lunch."
-
Damien took me to a small diner a few blocks away. We walked there and he showed me all the little shops. He even showed me a small park that had a water fountain with an angel as the statue. She was wearing a white robe and her palms were placed together as she held a silver heart in her hands. Water poured from her palms and into the fountain.
I stared at it for about five minutes until Damien told me we had to keep going. I followed beside him; looking around at the scenery. I'd been locked away for so long, forced to stare at the woods that held me captive. But here and now, I could take in all the things around me without having to worry about anything else.
"I think you'll like this," Damien placed a bowl of noodles and cheese in front of me, "it's not too out there like last night's meal, so you should be able to keep it down easily." The one thing I wasn't taught was food. I had no idea what he'd just placed in front of me or what it tasted like. I couldn't remake it back at the house; I couldn't do anything with it.
"What is it?" He chuckled and took the seat across from me; taking a bite of his sandwich.
"Mac and cheese, just try it." I sighed and took a small bite. It wasn't anything special, just a simple dish, but I loved it. But that's when the door dinged and James walked in.
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